perceptive observer
· storytelling is a form of protest ·
On FKA twigs, twisting pop, and routines

I ‘ve never seen a hero like me in a sci-fi

Back in February Chris tweeted the following:

FKA twigs, Chris, Robyn, Charli XCX

And I got hyped because it made me think about pop stars and how pop is finally getting interesting in terms of representation. The chicks in the picture are twisting the pop industry and that is exciting. I personally find authenticity in their art, and that inspires me. They own their narrative and dare to be vulnerable. They play with the social constructs imposed on them: what does it mean to be feminine? what does it mean to be sexy? what is a pop song? At least they make me question this. I appreciate that they bring to the fore fresh themes and ideas, not just ideals.

Even though I like to discuss the politics of pop culture I do not keep up with all of it. I recognized the chicks in the picture except from FKA twigs. Who is this girl? At the moment I opened spotify to listen to MAGDALENE, her latest album released in October 2019, and I remember writing a friend who also likes to talk about pop with me: “hey, do you know this chick ef kei ai twigs?” and my friend also had not hear much of her. So I assumed twigs was not particularly the Britney of this time, but still. Certainly her music is not the music that you will play to dance to. When would I listen to twigs? Her voice does not particularly lift me up, but at the same time I find it powerful. The first occasion I listened to her I found myself thinking something like “how is this pop?”. I was not at the right moment to pay attention to what I was listening to.

Months passed and suddenly the world was experiencing a global pandemic. I started working from home in march. One day I received a wetransfer link to download work files. WeTransfer has also this publication entitled WePresent where they write “unexpected stories about creativity”. I stumbled upon the name of FKA twigs again in one of their articles. “Oh that chick who was in the picture that Chris tweeted”, I thought. The article described the process twigs went through to come up with “cellophane“. The article highlights the stories behind a final production, which sometimes the public do not get to see. This process can be “hard, lonely, and repetitive”. Particularly for twigs, it took her more than a year of practice and discipline to learn pole dancing. Then when you see the video it makes sense. Because when I do not perceive the difficulty and struggle in a performance, is when I know there is a lot of work in the background. In an interview twigs was asked “how do you know when you are ready?” to which she answered: “When I start living it, when I can take risks and express myself”. Which also applies for any other form of art or discipline: playing an instrument, dancing, writing. When you are feeling it, people also feel it.

Practice and stories of discipline are often less glamorous and attractive. Repetition and routine seems not appealing, people just get to see the end results. And I feel we can learn so much from the stories of the hard work behind the scenes. Particularly the artists’ motivations and some sort of closeness to them. For example, I like contemporary dancing performances because they leave a high impression on me. Dancers make it so easy and beautiful to contemplate, twisting and jumping and using their bodies to convey a message, using their bodies with mastery and intention. Feeling it and making me feel their dance. I practiced contemporary dancing for a year. But not really. It was one day week, sometimes two, where I would get technique and creative lessons. And I felt the pain. But I enjoyed it so much. It made me appreciate dancing at another level. I like to watch the rehearsals of this contemporary dance group because it is during practice when I get to see their everyday discipline, including how they master their craft, gain strength, and improve their technique. It is also when I get to see them laughing, drinking water, sweating. Being relatable persons to an extent.

We have many stories and narratives of people who are “successful”, who “excel”, who “look good”, who appear to have things figured out. But behind every end product and “success” there is a process, one that regularly takes time and in which “mistakes” and “errors” are allowed, because they are part of the process. Adjustments and repetition are required to then just focus on living, as twigs described, to take risks during the performance, like what she did in cellophane. Sometimes creativity hurts and it is not glamorous, but people do it for a reason, and that reason sometimes goes beyond validation. Everyone has their personal motivations to do repetitive work.

The last thought that twigs provoked was on relationships. In the album there is this song called “home with you“, in her words:
“Sometimes it’s just easier to say exactly how you feel, so instead of like making up a problem here or making up a problem there if you just say like, “Hey. I’m lonely like do you want to just come and hang out?” That is easier to deal with rather than like the guilt trip, or like a manipulation. If you just say like, “Hey. I’m lonely. Do you want to get a tea for an hour?” That feels like a really honest exchange of a relationship. So, I guess, it’s all these times when we get in our head and we’re thinking like, “I need to do this. I need to do this. I need to do this.” If you just explain very simply in a sentence how you feel, it just makes it easier for everyone to say like, “What can I do for you right now? Like how can I be here for you right now?”

And when I read that I felt personally attacked. It made me think about past relationships and how I was not able to communicate my needs. But I am getting better at it, thank you twigs for the friendly reminder. In the song there is the line “I never seen a hero like me in a sci-fi”, in another interview she explained how it is ok not to feel amazing all the time, in an age when superheroes are glorified, from a female point of view there are still stories missing where you can see characters that can be beautifully strong, and perfect and flawed. Icons can be so much more. To an extent twigs is one of the much needed characters (which I won’t necessary label as heroes) that we needed to see. Shy, reserved, awkward. And that is ok. She can still rock a stage. Viva la autenticidad y honestidad con uno mismo.

Fun fact, I recently learned that a twig means “a slender woody shoot growing from a branch or stem of a tree or shrub”. 
I like twigs. 

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